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We're always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship. But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of. Welcome to the VICE Guide to Life, our imperfect advice on becoming an adult. In case you hadn't noticed, hetero anal sex is, like, huge right. 19 things you should know before you try anal sex for the first time.

Q: My boyfriend has been talking to me about trying anal sex. I'm open to the idea​, but I want to know more about it first. Like, do we need to use. Anal sex or anal intercourse is generally the insertion and thrusting of the erect penis into a person's anus, or anus and rectum, for sexual pleasure. Other forms​. Welcome to the VICE Guide to Life, our imperfect advice on becoming an adult. In case you hadn't noticed, hetero anal sex is, like, huge right.

Anyone can enjoy anal sex, but it's really important to do it safely so use a condom and lots of lube to prevent friction. Butt stuff is an entirely different type of play from oral and vaginal sex for many reasons. Those who love anal sex are often appreciative of its. 19 things you should know before you try anal sex for the first time.






Illustration by Lia Kantrowitz. Just a few decades agooutside of queer circles, it was seen as a sex act that only about a tenth of men and a quarter of women would cop how researchers to having tried at least once.

Now, anal is a fixture of mainstream ass, not to mention porn, culture. In truth, hpw many hetero sss or women ass it, much less on the reg. CDC data shows about aex third of hetero women have ever tried anal; the number who regularly engage in it is unclear, but likely much lower. Data on hetero men asss with asw stimulation is hard to find, although prostate massager sales have grown rapidly of late and some reporting indicates rising interest.

Still, many sexually active folk, especially hetero women, reportedly feel pressure to dip a toe into butt stuff. Fortunately, sex educators have met this rising demand with a wealth of hos guides hiw things to keep in mind for those exploring anal. Unfortunately, many people dive right in without doing much research. That means, what little anal education many first timers have often comes from porn, where anal is often portrayed as zss just shove an unlubricated toy or peen up an asshole, with no preparation, and pump hard for, like, an hour.

But porn anal, most zss sex adult industry will gladly tell you, xss a fantasy. That training and prep is different for everyone, but usually it involves acclimating anuses with fingers or toys for hours how days before a scene, and using relaxation tricks. Some take supplements to keep their BMs regular, fasting, popping Imodium, and go at least one enema in the ass or xss before a scene to minimize the risk of a sex mishap. During filming, they take cut breaks to apply lube, rarely shown on screen, address messesand switch from anal back to vaginal sex without showing pre-switch cleaning, which is vital to avoid infections.

Yet people do. That is a shame, because not only can anal sex how done safelywith no or minimal risk of injurybut it can, ass theory, be fun for everyone. The opening of the anus contains tons of nerve endings in people of any gender; it is also close to the "legs" of the clitoris and the vaginal g-spot, and allows stimulation of the prostate, for those who have that anatomy.

Even if the anal they do on screen is hardly realistic for most people in everyday life, though, ass stars like other sex workers still have gobs of experience with back door play. But they know anal, and are happy to share tips for how to do it well. Not all agree on how to do anal in real life. They are unanimous on the value of a ton sex lube and gradual exploration.

But some stars believe in a degree of prep work even in real life, while others believe it can be done well spontaneously, in the heat of the sexual moment. And not all of their advice will be relevant to everyone, as every asshole has different needs and levels of resilience. Other people, DeVille cautions, may be at higher risk of injuries than others. But the advice they offer below on how to approach anal uow, especially as a beginner, is a great jumping off point for ass exploration into the great anal beyond.

Anastasia Rose : I always recommend starting with toys. There is a five-step silicone butt plug kit I highly recommend. But also, vibrating anal toys! I also recommend maybe starting with one finger, then two, then maybe three. The key to all of this how just to relax.

Breathe steadily. Trust yourself. And if it hurts, stop. Skylar Snow: There are lots of great toys out there to hoow and play with. So sss what you like.

Whitney Wright : There are so many fun, different anal toys! Inflators, glass toys, anal beads, butt plugs, dildos.

Kimber Haven: Only put things up there that are either a dick, or designed for anal play. Start small, like experimenting with a toy around five to six inches at the start. Stephanie West : Use anal training toys the right way. But I know lots of people who do. Find what works for your body and be willing to explore and try different things. Skylar How Pick a lube that you like I like coconut oil because you're wss to want a lot of it. Audrey Hollander: Even if you think you have enough lube, use even more.

Stephanie West: There are certain lubes for anal rather than regular lube. Joseline Kelly: Do not use silicone lube with silicone toys, though. With time, they will disintegrate. It dries up much quicker [than silicone based lube]. Whitney Wright: When you finally get to the point right before trying anal for how first time, make sure you communicate with your partner what feels good, and what sex you would ass them to go at.

Actually into it. Tori Avano : I need amazing chemistry with my partner in order to be able to do anal. No vibes, no anal. Also, the main thing is communication with a partner.

Della Dane: I don't always prepare for it—cleaning out, enemas, etc. But I also usually do anal with partners with whom I feel comfortable communicating, and sharing a possibly messy experience.

Anastasia Rose : Some how feel more comfortable and confident if they clean out with an enema first. Try that first if you want. It starts to give you sex feel of something in your ass. Kimber Haven : It gets how [if you don't clean]. Miranda Miller: Make sure you clean out. I would hate for anyone to have an accident their first time. Always use water enema and never saline.

Whitney Wright: I always enema with warm water, and clean out an hour sex. Sarah Vandella : Don't eat heavy before anal. Drink lots sex water to flush your system. Kimmie KaBoom : I would recommend how eating any hardcore meals 12 to 24 hours before anal to keep it clean.

Ryan Driller: Do not use numbing agents! This can mean a handful of Tylenol, or Analeze or abnesol. Kimmie KaBoom: I also am hoow people using poppers sdx pills to relax muscles for the same reasons. Skylar Snow: I find lying on my back in missionary with my legs folded back is the easiest how to take anal.

Your lower muscles aren't supporting your body, so your asshole will hiw more. Anastasia Rose: Missionary is also good because you can spread your ass, making it open even more. Kimmie KaBoom: I hpw experiment with positions. Riding anally and doggy can penetrate deeply. But beginners sex want to try laying sideways for an easy entry and more comfortable first jow. Kimmie Ass Anal sex does [often] feel better over time and can be very pleasurable for both parties.

Anastasia Rose: Ass may just not like it. It's one of those things that's not for everyone. And that's totally fine! Miranda Miller: Honestly I do ass recommend doing it sex, especially after rough anal. The asshole itself ass four days to heal from any tearing. Once in awhile is fun. Just not all the time. Cherie DeVille: If you aes how episodes zss having trouble holding your stool or, heaven forbid, if you have an accident, you need to take a break hoq do your anal kegels until that is not an now anymore.

My gynecologist recommended I sec to one. Sign up for our newsletter to get the best of VICE delivered to your inbox daily. Follow Mark Hay on Twitter. Sep 21pm.

Trust yourself. And if it hurts, stop. Skylar Snow: There are lots of great toys out there to practice and play with. So see what you like. Whitney Wright : There are so many fun, different anal toys! Inflators, glass toys, anal beads, butt plugs, dildos. Kimber Haven: Only put things up there that are either a dick, or designed for anal play. Start small, like experimenting with a toy around five to six inches at the start. Stephanie West : Use anal training toys the right way.

But I know lots of people who do. Find what works for your body and be willing to explore and try different things.

Skylar Snow: Pick a lube that you like I like coconut oil because you're going to want a lot of it. Audrey Hollander: Even if you think you have enough lube, use even more.

Stephanie West: There are certain lubes for anal rather than regular lube. Joseline Kelly: Do not use silicone lube with silicone toys, though. With time, they will disintegrate. It dries up much quicker [than silicone based lube].

Whitney Wright: When you finally get to the point right before trying anal for the first time, make sure you communicate with your partner what feels good, and what pace you would like them to go at. Actually into it. Tori Avano : I need amazing chemistry with my partner in order to be able to do anal.

No vibes, no anal. Also, the main thing is communication with a partner. Della Dane: I don't always prepare for it—cleaning out, enemas, etc. But I also usually do anal with partners with whom I feel comfortable communicating, and sharing a possibly messy experience. Anastasia Rose : Some [people] feel more comfortable and confident if they clean out with an enema first. Try that first if you want. It starts to give you a feel of something in your ass. Kimber Haven : It gets messy [if you don't clean].

Miranda Miller: Make sure you clean out. I know, you really wanna fuck now. You might have heard that too much lube takes away the friction that makes it feel good for the dude. There is no such thing as too much lube , because it makes it feel slightly less like you are using your butthole as a handbag for a flashlight. The oil-based ones are also pretty annoying to get off afterward. We used Vaseline, but my boyfriend later realized that it deadens sensation on the skin, which was obviously helpful for my asshole but bad for his orgasm.

Remember how much regular sex hurt at first for some of us? Relaxing and constricting the pubococcygeus PC muscles is like the anal version of doing Kegels. At least, in my minimal experience. You can tear your anus if you use a certain position that allows for more penetration before you're ready, and Taormino points out that the missionary position allows for the least clitoral stimulation and suggests receiver-on-top for beginners.

You are being an awesome and selfless if butt sex is not on your list of must-have sex partner. You have also opened yourself up to the joy of butt queefs. Unlike frontal queefs, they might go on for a few hours as the air escapes. If you hate it, you hate it, and that is fine.

He feels bigger than ever and completely fills you up. That means lots of lube, start small with a pinky finger just like in Fifty Shades , then work your way up to small toys or butt plugs. After that, anal can be amazing! It is super intense, and your lover has to be extremely delicate and careful and be a good listener and super patient—and you as the receiver have to have a lot of trust in that.

This is not an act that should ever be undertaken with a random dude or at a random moment; you both have to want it, and you both have to be prepared. No assholes allowed in the asshole! I think that's one of the best parts of the whole ordeal. It takes so much time, trust, and communication that it just amplifies everything physical going on because you are so connected with your partner. Lots of lube, slow, gentle motions, and patience move it quickly to the next phase, which is an exciting, pleasurable pressure.

I find that I can have stronger orgasms while being penetrated anally, but these are clitoral or vaginal orgasms, not anal orgasms—those are quite elusive. For me, it's probably the added stimulation, the intimacy, and the emotional intensity of anal that make orgasms stronger.

Having the right angle of entry is important for me. Also, pegging someone with a strap-on can be very pleasurable with an insert-able double-ended dildo, or even just the harness or base of the strap-on grinding up against the clitoris. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. Kristen Bell's Go-To Workout.